Bosses have good intentions, but default to unhelpful modes of operation—especially when feeling stress, anxiety, fear, uncertainty, etc.
And when that happens, the boss’s influence suffers, their people lose enthusiasm, and business growth stalls.
Awareness is half the battle. So let me help you recognize what it can look like to drop into a fear-based version of yourself.
What follows are six examples of how a boss can leak their leadership power and influence, thus slowly becoming less and less effective as a leader of their team. I’ve given the characters names, so you can differentiate yourself from the character. It’s not who you are. It’s a tendency you have when you feel fear.
1. Gary Grabback: Gary Grabback is the king of reverse delegation. This happens when you hand off a job, task, or function to someone, but then take it back. Maybe it wasn’t getting done quickly enough. Maybe it wasn’t done the way you thought was best. Or perhaps there was just some anxious instinct that couldn’t trust and needed control. Either way, you’re sabotaging your leadership and undermining your team. This is a surefire way to train your people to be under performers.
Gary Grabback trains his people to be slackers—they know they don’t have to work hard because, eventually, Gary will step in and fill the gaps. They know they don’t need to work with urgency because, if it comes down to the wire, Gary will bail them out. They also know Gary doesn’t have much confidence in them, so they may either leave to find more fulfilling work or simply go through the motions, doing just enough to get a paycheck. Do you have a tendency to be a Gary Grabback?
2. Burnout Bob: Burnout Bob has lost his edge. He’s running on empty, no longer fueled by passion, no longer connected to his purpose, and certainly not bringing his A-game. He’s started to develop bad habits, coping mechanisms, and unhealthy behaviors to compensate for the stress and dissatisfaction. Burnout Bob is on a path toward discouragement, depression, and perhaps even destruction. Can you relate to Burnout Bob?
3. Solo Sam: Sam has allowed himself to become isolated. They say it’s lonely at the top, but Sam has made sure of it. He doesn’t trust people, he’s suspicious of motives, and he’s committed to protecting what he’s worked so hard for. He’s experienced abandonment, betrayal, and plenty of disappointment, so he isolates himself, keeping others at arm’s length. While this might mean less pain, it also means less passion, less energy, less synergy, less harmony, and less teamwork. People may respect Solo Sam, but they don’t know him. They don’t feel loyal to him and don’t feel like they matter to him either. Are you isolating yourself like Solo Sam?
4. Frustrated Frank: Frustrated Frank tries to convince himself that he’s not an angry person—he’s just frustrated. He just gets irritated and doesn’t want to tolerate subpar performance. There’s always something that frustrates Frank: having to repeat himself, little things going wrong, unexpected challenges, a missed measurable, or an overlooked detail. Instead of confidently and creatively coaching his team toward improvement, innovation, or higher performance, Frustrated Frank keeps everybody on edge.
Frank learned to control people around him by tapping into that angry energy—“You don’t want to see me very upset.” This intensity can seem effective for getting things done and even achieving quick results, but it fails over the long haul. Nobody likes to walk on eggshells, or fear being embarrassed, yelled at, or fired. It’s difficult to be led by someone whose emotions are up and down. Eventually, a team gets tired of it, and high performers move on to somewhere they can achieve, earn, and be successful in a more peaceful environment. Do you have shades of Frustrated Frank?
5. Needy Nancy: Needy Nancy is codependent, subconsciously relying on her team or staff for her sense of personal value. She gives instructions but in a way that needs approval. She checks in frequently to make sure people are doing things right, but it’s really to keep herself feeling alright.
Nancy sometimes thinks others are talking about her. She’s anxious and needs reassuring. Instead of being strong, communicating a clear vision, and coaching team members toward consistent execution, Nancy seeks their approval. She wants to be liked more than she likes to lead. It’s difficult to draw greatness out of others when you’re constantly looking around for others to affirm the greatness you hope they see in you. Can you relate to Needy Nancy?
6. Sally Scarcity: Sally has a scarcity mindset—there’s never enough. There’s always a lack. It’s glass half empty, but not necessarily in a pessimistic way—more in a fearful way. She fears not having enough time, not having enough money, not having enough potential, or not having the right people. Instead of believing the best and pursuing a vision with confidence and courage, her scarcity mindset has her always hedging her bets. She only performs at 80% capacity, with most of her energy spent waiting for the other shoe to drop and protecting herself from what she fears is inevitable disappointment. Do you have anything in common with Sally Scarcity?
Leadership Leaks threaten to sabotage your success. You used to think they were protecting you, but they are actually preventing growth and progress. Not to mention, repelling other high performers.
Before moving on, make sure you note the one or two characters with whom you most closely identify. If you want help building a plan to overcome these tendencies, message me.
